Fanning Embryo to Star in Film

LOS ANGELES, CA – Following in the footsteps of fully developed actress sisters Elle and Dakota, the embryo of an unborn, unnamed Fanning child has officially signed on to star in its own feature film, Lions Gate studio representatives announced today.

The contract, worth an estimated $3 million, would make the Fanning embryo the world’s highest paid non-living entity, eclispsing only actress Katherine Heigl in that category.

Dakota, only 14, has quickly become a Hollywood mainstay, appearing in such hits as I am Sam, War of the Worlds and Charlotte’s Web.

Elle, 10, starred in 2002’s Daddy Day Care.

David Spade Breaks Wrists; Beach Blanket Bingo Remake on Hold

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LOS ANGELES, CA – New Line Cinemas yesterday announced they have indefinitely postponed filming the remake of Annette Funicello & Frankie Avalon’s classic “Beach Blanket Bingo” after star David Spade broke both his wrists during an off camera Slap Game contest with co-star Michael Clarke Duncan (playing a tanner, more muscular Avalon).

Spade (channeling his inner-Funicello) crumbled to the sand in pain Monday just as Duncan connected with a double-handed slap that film extras say sounded similar to “breaking a handful of twigs in half”.

Spade was examined by medical personnel at the scene before storming off the set, visibly emotional and groggy after being administered an unknown pain medication.